Naive

If I could laugh at myself

I would.

I always knew

Somehow

Some things never change

We're not meant 

Or built 

For it.

I'm drowning myself

In thoughts.

I can feel it

Creeping closer and closer

I order it to stay away

But every time I look

The circle is smaller and smaller

I can barely move

Or breathe.

It keeps me awake.

I can feel it.

It laughs

It smiles

It's happy

It's showing everything it stole from me

Like a big parade of what I could have

Or be.

Fuck

Make it stop.

I want to make it stop

I was all right

I am all right

It will be all right.

No

It won't.

Now, take those pills the doctor said would make you better.

Take them all.

Just one more.

Maybe two.

Three would do the trick.

Four for sure.

Five and I'll be gone forever.

No, that would be six.

Really, you shouldn't be trusted with this many.

Look, you're a danger to yourself.

I'm not the one doing this to you.

That's on you.

Don't blame it on others.

Everything is your fault.

All of this.

All of it.

Every wrong turn

Every decision

Every penny

Every little shit you have

And are

That's on you.

You

And only you.

Fuck you.

You little piece of trash

Every chance in the world

Wasted

All the potential

Wasted

All the love offered

Wasted

You deserve nothing

Yet, you ask for everything.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

No one cares

No one will ever care

Just do it

Retarded piece of shit

Can't even go through this

Just cry in your bed to sleep

Hoping for things to solve themselves

Well, fuck you kindly

Fuck you

Fuck you

Fuck you.

Die.